Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Friends with an Ex?: As told by Alana @ Life and Times

Welcome to my first guest poster while I'm in 2 weeks of heaven!
I'm missing you guys like crazy already but I've lined up a few people to take good care of you while I'm away:)

Alana is pretty much the tits and was one of my first blogger friends.
She's got one of the kindest hearts I've ever come across (She takes in foster kids! A lady after my own heart!).  Not to mention that she has a kick-ass post that runs on Thursdays called Awkward & Awesome. You guys definitely need to check it out:)

So let's chat being friends with an ex, shall we?
Make sure you go and show her some love!!

Hey y'all! I'm Alana from Life & Times of the Intelligent Blonde

I'm here today to discuss a very important topic--is it possible to be friends with an ex?
Everyone has different opinions on the topic, so here are my thoughts...
Why would you want to remain friends with an ex?
- You want to keep tabs on him (don't lie to yourself and pretend you're not even a little bit curious about your exes). 
- You don't want to admit that it's over.
- He was a huge part of your life and you don't like the idea of him being gone in every aspect of your life.
- You're friends with his mother/family.
Now that we've addressed the reasons why you might be wanting to remain friends, let's discuss the plausibility of the situation:
- Do you trust him?
- Can you stand to see him with another woman?
- Are you ready to listen to endless conversations about his new relationship issues?
- Will you be able to move on and be happy if he's still in your life?
If you answered "no" to any of these questions, bid him farewell, delete him from facebook, and MOVE on!  It's probably not a good idea to keep him in your life--after all, you broke up for a reason!
I'm a firm believer in "when it's over, it's over."  I very rarely consider getting back together with an ex. 
With all of that being said, I do believe it's possible to remain friends with an ex, in select situations; for instance, if you only dated for a few weeks/months, if you were friends long before you started dating, and/or he turned out to be gay.  
You may not enjoy listening to him talk about his new girlfriend, you might cringe a little when a picture pops up on your newsfeed, and you might secretly wish her teeth would permanently turn yellow, but it is possible to tolerate all of those things for the sake of his happiness. 
I can't say that successful friendships have been the result of all of my failed relationships--in fact, I can count on one hand how many exes I even speak to, but I do believe that friendships are possible. 
I truly believe it all depends on the guy and the situation. 
But let's be honest, we all know that he'll never do better than you!  
What are your thoughts? Is it possible?



  1. Thanks so much for letting me guest post! Can't wait to see what you have in store for my readers soon!

  2. for sure!
    I tell my ex everything about my life, he tells me everything about his. Were both single now, but we've even befriended each others half when we had them.